I stared into the flickering black candle that sat in the midst of the skull
and black-handled knives on my home made alter to Satan. Reciting the
incantation, I tried to ignore my nagging thoughts. I was still young ---
just a teenager. How had I come to the place where I felt like I was sliding
headfirst into hell.
As I grew up my family attended church each Sunday, said
meals, and had the standard 20 pound family Bible on the coffee table. I
always knew about "God."
But during the boring Sunday church services I wondered, "Is this all there
is to knowing God? How could I get closer to Him?" With these feelings, I
soon rebelled against church and simply stopped going.
In junior high school being part of the crowd meant being a devoted fan of
rock and roll music. A neighbor introduced me to heavy metal rock, and I
instantly liked it. Soon a single rock album grew into a large collection of
rock albums. I had to listen to my music constantly. I skipped school so I
could have it all day. I bought an electric guitar and tried to form my own
rock band so I could be like my rock heroes.
Then I noticed that all my favorite performers promoted occult or Satanic
practices in their songs. This frightened me, But the rock music was
stronger than my dislike of black magic. I wondered if this "god" of the
rock bands was what I had been searching for!
I wasted no time finding out.
Soon I had a personal library on the black arts and a huge "circle of salt"
on the basement floor at home. I bought albums only if they talked about
witchcraft, voodoo, or Satanism. I wrote an upside-down cross outside my
black tee shirt, which proudly proclaimed, "Satan lives!"
Finally, I easily began leading others into the worship of Satan. Teenagers
would beg to join my "coven."
As you can see, I was actively involved in my religion rather than simply
sitting in a church pew for one or two hours each Sunday.
You may wonder if I ever witnessed anything demonic or supernatural.
Because I'm uncomfortable discussing my past in detail, let's just say that
my dread and despair seemed to grow more suffocating each day. Instead of
finding the pathway to God, I was sliding headfirst into the depths of hell.
About this time my dad had some routine surgery. In his hospital room was
a Christian patient who eagerly talked about the forgiveness of sin Jesus
Christ offers by trusting Him as personal Saviour. Although my dad had gone
to church for years, this roommate had something he didn't have. Soon my
father trusted Christ as his Saviour and became a child of God.
But there was a child of Satan back home!
Picture this: Downstairs is a teenage Satanist son with a huge hexagram on
the floor, an altar to Satan nearby, and rock and roll music constantly
blasting from the stereo; upstairs is a new Christian father who suddenly
understands what is taking place in his home!
It wasn't pretty.
I could yell as loudly as my dad when we argued, but there was one thing I
couldn't fight -- his prayers for me, along with the prayers of all his new
After weeks of increasing despair, one day I confessed to my best friend --
who studied the occult with me -- that I wanted out of Satanism. He reminded
me: Don't even think of leaving, or else...... But soon he admitted that he
felt just as bad. We were helplessly trapped.
That evening we drove to the Niagara River to end our lives. In a few
minutes the swift currents would plunge us over the Niagara Falls to a sure
death -- and eternity in hell. Obviously we didn't do it, and all I know is
that when I got home to my bedroom, I knelt beside the bed and poured out my
heart to God.
"Dear Lord," I said, " I'm not sure You even exist. And even if You do
exist, I'm not sure You can help me. And even if You can help me, I'm not
too sure that You will. but whatever happens form this point on, I want You
to know that I am giving my life completely to You. Please forgive me for
all that I have done wrong, and help me to love the way You love. Amen"
I expected Satan to kill me that night for deserting him. But I slept like
a baby, and the next morning I woke up a new person! Jesus Christ filled my
heart with a joy so strong that even Satan couldn't take it away! I can't
honestly say everything improved immediately, but that night God freed me
from Satan and changed my life forever.
Life For You
You may not have rebelled as much as I did, but you do need Christ as much
as anyone. Your sin keeps you from God just as much as my sin kept me from
Him. Jesus Christ is a real person - -God in flesh -- who died for all our
sins and then rose from the grave three days later to defeat death. Only He
can offer forgiveness and eternal life to those who will trust in Him as the
sacrifice for their sin.
A bible verse I had known form childhood explains why Jesus died for us:
"God so loved the world [you and me] that He gave His one and only Son, That
whoever believes in Him will not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16
Jesus also said, "Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life, But whoever
rejects the Son will not see life, for God's wrath remains on him" John 3:36
You have a choice to make, my friend, just like I did --trust Christ and
follow Him to heaven, or do nothing and face eternity in hell. No matter
what your sin, if He can save a teenage devil worshipper like me, He can
save you too. Trust in Christ today!
God Bless You,