I was at church one day and a team of young people from all over the world
came to put on a musical/drama. This planted a desire in my heart to do
something like this too. I dreamed about it often but I thought it could
never be possible for me. My parents were not well off and I thought the
only way for me to do something like this was to go to a bible college and
that required lots of money.
I didn't see how or when I could go to Bible College but I saved all the
money I could from odd jobs and I asked for prayer about it and let other
people know that this is what I wanted to do when they asked me about my
plans for the future.
Sometime around then, my mother, who has had severe mental illness for seven
years ran away and no one could find her. My father and I were very
distressed. Eventually she was found and was brought back home. The drug
she was taking was a good drug for her problem, although they were still
trying to figure out the right dosage and she was very lethargic. Just
after my mom got back, one or two weeks later, my boss called me and I was
late for work. My dad usually wakes me up and drives me to work, but this
time he was still in bed, a little unusual for him. He had been acting very
unusual these past couple of weeks since my mothers return...like forgetting
things and even where he lived! He went into a trance when he was driving
me home from my work one time, that was creepy. I finally directed him
home...but I didn't know what to do about it; others seemed to think I was
overreacting by saying anything about it at all.
Anyway, this certain morning, I ran around pulling on clothes and raced back
to my fathers office (they still slept in separate rooms at this point) and
called to him to wake up! As I stared at his back (facing the wall), I saw
he was shaking. I didn't know what he was doing so I went closer and leaned
over him and attempted to wake him, when I saw there was blood oozing from
his mouth and nose. He started to toss and moan unintelligibly and I was
alarmed about what to do at first. I called a lady who worked for the
ambulance and she came and immediately called for the ambulance to take my
dad to the hospital. He was taken from the local hospital to the big city,
and then eventually to a bigger city. When the ambulance came the first
time they made some noise and my mom woke up and I could see her gasp in
fright...but I went to her and told her everything was alright, dad's been
taking care of and I tried to comfort her and she simply just sat on the
couch and an incredible calm just subdued her...she hardly spoke a word.
INCREDIBLE...if you had known how her illness had consumed her before.
Anyway, my dad finally came out of his incoherent seizure and called from
the hospital where they had taken him. He told me how much he loves me as
usual, then he told me I needed to sit down he needed to tell me something
important. That scared me some, but I obeyed and sat down on the floor
in front of the phone stand. He told me they had found cancer in his brain.
I felt a lump in my throat and I couldn't speak, he asked if I was still
there, was I ok? My dad means everything to me, and at this point in my
life I didn't feel like I could survive without him. I couldn't cry, I had
to be strong. I didn't want him or my mother to feel any more sorrow because
of my own grief. I whispered weakly, I was still there.
He went through a cat scan and they found this lump that had formed in his
brain, and there were so many people praying for him at this time when he
went through this operation. During this time, my dog Button's came into
labor, and shortly after she died with all her puppies inside her. It was
very hard. I cried. That dog was a very good and gentle dog, and often
shoved her muzzle into your hand when you were feeling miserable and was a
great comfort to us all during the time of my mothers illness ever since we
first got her as a puppy. I knew my dad would be heart broken too. Since
no one was there to tell accept a man who I DIDN'T LIKE who offered to drive
me and Buttons to the vet, I felt very alone. I felt terrible that I had to
be with THIS man during this time and I had to cry so I looked out the
veterinarians big window with tears streaming down my face (which was in a
grimace because I was too proud to cry out loud in front of this man!!).
The operation went well and everything was fine. The cancer was
benign...PRAISE GOD! He came home, but he couldn't drive for one year. I
planned to take care of my parents this year, but I had been hoping to go to
Prairie Bible College in the fall...I guess this will never happen, I
thought to myself.
My sister, at this time, was going through financial difficulties and her
and her husband and children lost their house. They needed a place to live,
so they arranged to come live with my parents! Thus, freeing me to go to
I was able to go to Bible College in the fall, and have been a part of
touring/singing groups and ministries just like I had dreamed...of course
not without difficulties and challenges, but WOW! My sister and her husband
were able to buy another house very near to where my parents live after a
year....just the perfect amount of time for my dad to recover! God has
INCREDIBLE timing! He DOES care, and HIS WAYS are above my ways! I can't
understand why God works the way He works sometime, but my dad always quotes
me this verse; "For all things work together for good to them who love God,
to them who are the called according to His purpose." (Rom 8:28) I
sometimes groaned audibly when he told me this when my mom was in one of her
most obnoxious behaviors or when life seemed like there was no God at all
to care for me, but that verse really stuck.
Now I'm serving in Japan this year as a missionary and being provided for as
well! I NEVER thought this was possible!!! There were so many barriers, so
many mountains to climb, so many obstacles...OUR GOD IS AN AWESOME GOD!
NOTHING IS TOO DIFFICULT FOR HIM and His grace is sufficient for us. He
will never leave us or forget us. I never thought my situation could ever
change, or that my mother would ever get better, but seasons do change...and
these things pass. One thing is for sure, God is faithful and true to His
promises even when at the time it seems he has forgotten us, nothing can
hide us from His love.
In testimony of the Savior's love,
E-mail - firstname.lastname@example.org